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Isn't obsession great?
This started out as a quotes page, but I've realized that I want to put in commentary and bloopers in, too.  Submit additions to this page with the form at the bottom.

How many people sit there with a pad of paper taking notes when they watch eppies?  Well, at least one...

Royal Flush

Mike (W.H. Woolhat): Have everything monogrammed!

Shame, shame on Peter!  Stealing towels!  Shocking.
("Everyone does it")


Monkee See, Monkee Die

Mike: Well, uh, it's a little gloomy, but we could probably work wonders with just a few geraniums.
Micky: Uh-huh. YOU decorate. I'M leaving!

Mike: Wanna read my palm?
Micky: No, wait'll they make it into a movie.

Mike seems so out of character when he's trying to attract the Saint Bernard.  That seems more like a Peter kind of thing to me.
However, while dogsitting a male corgi, I found myself saying "C'mon, big fella" in that same tone, inflection, and accent.

Submitted by Sam:

In the scene where they go downstairs and find the knives in the wall, Micky goes over to look at them and there are two knives in the wall next to him. When it goes from the shot of Davy back to Micky w/ the Sherlock Holmes outfit on, there's only one knife, and there isn't even a hole to show that the other one might have been there. Weird!
Monkees vs. Machine

Mike:  Here's one: "Must have own bicycle.  Boy to deliver...  pianos"?

Mike: Just remember these three little words : Don't  argue.
Peter: That's two words.
Mike: You've started already.

DJ-61: *Whirrrr-groan* *smokes*
Mike: Ooh, I bet you're a real swinger when you're turned on.
(Hahaha... I love it....  Mike's such a hottie.)

Submitted by Sue:
DJ61:  Correction...What is real name?
Peter:  I......
Dj61:  Name is not Notwhat, name is Nitwit.
Peter:  Oh, brother.
DJ61:  Brother is nitwit!

Submitted by Liz from Liz's Site :
PETER: "No experience and no training necessary, and I couldn't even get that job! That machine was ten times smarter than me!"
MIKE: "Look, man, that's okay! Beside you've got something that the machine doesn't have!"
PETER: "Hmmm?"
MIKE: "You've got friends!"
MICKY: "You've got friends, Pete?! Bring them over someday!"


Your Friendly Neighborhood Kidnappers

This episode doesn't help the "Who sleeps where" confusion that is always present in Fanfic.  In the second season, they all shared the upstairs room.  In this episode, they're imprisoned in the downstairs bedroom.  I always picture it  with Mike and Micky sleeping in the upstairs bedroom, and Peter and Davy in the downstairs bedroom.
Arrrgh.


The Spy Who Came In From The Cool

Mike: See that man over there?  He talks to Popsicles.

Micky: Now, tell me what's special about your lighter.
Mike: This here lighter contains a miniature Japanese camera *click*
Micky: Right.
Mike: And a miniature Japanese cameraman.
*lights the lighter*
*scream*
Whoops, scorched ya again, there, Yamashita.

Hee hee hee.  In the film at the end, Davy snaps Mike's suspenders and Mike puts his hand to his chest.  I bet it hurts to have a suspender snap into your nipple.

Submitted by Christy McDaniel :
Warning: DO NOT SING "SWANEE RIVER" OR DANCE AND GET EVERYONE TO SING ALONG WITH YOU! THEY'LL THINK YOU'RE NUTS!

GCF response: As opposed to the man who talks to popsicles?


The Success Story

Mike: Where are you headed?
Grandfather Jones: London, England
Mike: I better take the freeway, then.

Hmmm... Peter's lips don't move on the first couple "Don't fly!"s.

*Cheesy Italian Accent*
Justa because you make-a bad spaghetti, doesn't mean you get to keep-a the uniform!

Submitted:
Davy: Great, now get me my comb.
Peter: Get it yourself.


Monkees in a Ghost Town

Peter: Cross at the green, not in between!
Davy: He's been out in the sun too long.
Micky: He was no bargain in the shade.

Good Mike versus Bad Mike.... *swoon*

Bad Mike: He paid me $500 for your life.
Good Mike:  $500?  I just have three words to say to you!
Bad Mike: What?
Good Mike: Six hundred dollars?

When Peter is pretending to be Spider, his voice is really deep!  I mean, WOW.

I never would have thought of this in a bazillion years unless my dad had said something, but George (the bad guy, you know?) is Uncle Leo from Seinfeld.  Now that he's said it, I totally see it, but I wouldn't have before.

Submitted by Christie McDaniel :
All Monkees: "Well, That's Show Business!"


Don't Look a Gift Horse in the Mouth

I had a dream that Davy was racing a horse a couple of weeks after I saw this episode.  I vividly remember the horse in the dream having "4" as it's number.  Guess what?  The number of the horse in this episode is *drumroll* "4"!


The Chaperone

Vandenburg:  Where did she go?
Mike:  I give up, where?

I love seeing Mike try to open the bag of pretzels.

Is Micky's wig on slightly sideways?

Oh, man.  I can't listen to Take a Giant Step anymore without picturing Mr. Clean dancing during the "ba-ba-ba-ba-bump-bump" part.

Submitted by Rainbow at The Library of Babyface Morales :
Micky: You do that and I'll be sorry! Actually, it's "You do and I'll be sorry".

Submitted by NeLLiE:
When the boys (Davy, Micky and Mike) go to get Mrs. Weefers (or is it Weevers?? anyway....) to get her into her dress, and find her passed out on the bed, they can't decide what is wrong with her.  If you listen, right after Davy says, "She's stoned."  You can hear Mike say, "Drunk!"  So, which is it??  I'm thinking that she's drunk, since she is constantly drinking, but I'll let you decide!!

Submitted by Chantel at The Pump Room :
Did you notice how the film gets blurry when Gen. Vandenburg sees Micky walking down the stairs? I guess that's why he thought Micky was a knock out. Hey, so did I.
GCF- Me, I think it's the flush of new love that makes it all blurry...
It's a truth of all stories that when an otherwise perfectly masculine looking man dresses up like a woman, some poor sap falls in love with him.


The Monkees Pilot [Here Come the Monkees]

My, my.  Micky's haircut.  Need I say more?

The whole unPadness of the house in this episode was really weird.  My friend Martha agrees, but then, we're both the type to get all worked up over those kind of details.

Submitted by Liz from Liz's Site :
In this episode you can notice that when the Monkees are preforming a song that Micky has his regular hair cut, the logo on the drums is different, and the screen is brighter.
GCF says: Yeah, that's because the version of Let's Dance On in the original (unaired) version of the pilot was sung by Boyce and Hart, and so the original footage has the boys lip-syncing at the wrong speed.  Plus, Davy's on the guitar, and that's just silly.  The unaired original version of the pilot (which comes with the box set of videos) has different credits, Boyce and Hart singing the songs, and some slightly different scenes.


Monkees A la Carte

Mike: I dunno, man, but don't do it again!

Eating the sandwich like that can't be sanitary. : )

Peter and Mike dancing around with those big slabs of meat.... so cute!

Submitted by Liz from Liz's Site :
(Micky is recording something)
Micky:Hey Guys I think I got something hot! (you can here the feet of the guys running over) Now listen to this...
Recorder (repeating) Micky: Come here guys I think I got something hot! (running feet) Now listen to this!
(Mike Pulls down chef over Micky's face)


I've Got a Little Song Here

Davy: What do you want to do?
Mike: Oh, I don't know. I just thought I'd sort of sit around the house and FAIL.
(Thanks to Fuzzy (Nevada Fuzzy & The Dreaded German Chickie Corps ) for IDing this quote)

Being a devoted Nezhead, I get so sad when I see Mike taken in like that.  He's the responsible one!  He should have known better!

I just saw the actor who played Bernie Class on Friends the other night.

Bernie Class on ambition:
Bernie:  How old are you?
Mike:  21, sir.
Bernie:  When I was your age, I was 22.

Mike looks so puppy dog sad in this eppie....  You just want to go comfort him, if you get my drift.

During the Mary, Mary romp, the shirt colors change rather a lot.  (Peter changes between red 8-button and orangy yellow 8-button, Micky and Davy between  red 8-buttons and regular white button down.)

Peter shows his infamously cute smile at the end, and I can understand how people become Torkaholics.

Submitted by Brandi from Monkeelove.homestead.com
During the "Gonna Buy Me a Dog" romp, when they're being driven off in the dog catcher wagon, you can see that Peter's window doesn't have any glass in it. He sticks his hand and head through!

Submitted by Jessica
Notice that wonderful little pair of frameless glasses that that dude with the cigar is wearing, and Peter wears.
I can't even count how many episodes I saw those in...I'd like to own those.


One Man Shy

Micky: You do that and I'll be sorry!

Ronnie: Tork, you look just like Nesmith.
Mike: I've killed me many a mountain lion with this here bow and arrow.
Ronnie:  Go ahead.
Mike: Well, they were just little bitty mountain lions.

Davy: I'm Mister Tork's private English tailor.  Isn't that nice?

Not only does Mike announce HIS OWN SONG incorrectly as "You May Just Be The One", it's listed that way in the end credits.
(The correct title and lyric is "You Just May Be The One".)

Submitted by Pimpin' Katie :
Micky: "You're going to have such a wonderful hunting jacket, the foxes won't know what to do!"
(or something to that effect)
GCF response:  I think it might be "the foxes won't know what hit 'em."


Dance, Monkee, Dance

Mike: Miss Buntwell, Miss Buntwell, I just can't fight it, it's like chemistry!
Miss Buntwell: But I failed chemistry!
Mike: Uh, Miss Buntwell, Miss Buntwell, I can't fight it, it's like... biology?
Miss Buntwell: Oh, I passed biology!
Mike: Oh, that's good.

I've heard that the woman Smoothie Mike is dancing with is his mom.

My favorite TMR!  (The part where they're dancing, that is.)

In the credits, "I'll Be Back Up On My Feet" is listed as "I'll Be Back On My Feet Again".


Too Many Girls

Fern's cleavage is all fuzzed out at the "Beauty Contest".

Wooohoooo!  Now that I've got the full set of episodes, I can watch Billy Roy Hodstetter all the time.  He's so cute!  And that wink!


Son of a Gypsy

Davy just kind of wanders aimlessly in the backround when Maria talks to Marco.

Davy removes the clips from the safe on the close up, but on all the other shots, the clips are still there.  He put so much work into cracking that safe, but from the looks of it, he should have just pulled it open.  The owner didn't have to put in a combination or anything.  And don't you just love how they just have to clip a plunger to something to blow it up?  No actual explosives or anything.  Of course, they never blow up the thing they're trying to blow up.

Marco fit into Peter's blue shirt and gray pants amazingly well, considering their difference in heights, weights, etc. : )

Submitted by Erin :
We oughta cite Davy to the ASPCA! When he pulls things out of the bag, he pulls out a cute little bunny rabbit by the ears! I heard that's considered cruelty to animals!

Response from Jessica :
Not to mention in the gift horse episode when he throws a chicken in the air during the romp.


Case of the Missing Monkee

Micky: He's very emotional.
Mike: Yeah, he cries at card tricks.

Peter: Nervous?  Don't be silly.  Look how slowly I'm twitching.

Mike: It says right here on the menu- "My Patient"

1438 N. Beachwood?  Davy got hit on the head harder than he thought : )

No offense, Davy fans, but he looks like a girl when when he has that surgical cap on and his hair curls out to the sides.


I Was a Teenage Monster

During VH1's Monkee Marathon, they cut out the part about the doctor's beautiful daughter.  Huh.

Submitted by Jessica :
The dude that plays the monster is the dude from Happy Gilmore with the nail sticking out of his head.
Ed note:  Really?  Wow.  I guess I can see that.


Find the Monkees

The Jolly Green Giants are just plain CREEPY.  Not scary creepy, but crazy-guy-who-lives-down-the-block creepy.  I mean, ewww.

And ya know what bugs me about the Martians?  (Apart from the way they use the same costumes for Monkees at the Circus, that is.)  It's the way the one guy has different color pantyhose over his head.

Submitted by Rainbow at The Library of Babyface Morales :
I agree with ya 'bout the Green Giants. And the Martians aren't exactly prizes. And the Agents? Dorks.


Monkees in the Ring

Promoter (can't remember his name): Do you know what's closest to my heart?
Mike, Micky, & Peter: Your lungs.

Reporter: What fight was most important to you?
Davy: The Revolutionary War.  That's when we gave you this little island.  No letters on that, please.

Mike: Shylo.. Sholto's office.  Violence is our business.

Mike: You don't know anything about boxing!
Davy: That's not so! I used to be quite a scrapper at school, y'know.  There was this one big bully, always used to be pickin' on me, so one day I went wham-o! with a right and wham-o! with a left!
Peter: What happened?
Davy: She never bothered me again.

Hmmm... Davy, shirtless, sweaty, working out...  Not trying to appeal to the girls, are they?


The Prince and the Pauper

That Wendy sure is accepting.  I know she had met Ludlow before, but it didn't bother her that she was wooed and proposed to by Davy?

Like Mike said, Davy moves fast!  He only said a few words to that reporter before sitting down and making out with her.

Thanks to Rainbow at The Library of Babyface Morales for fixing Ludlow's name for me.  I was doin' this one from memory.


Monkees at the Circus

Peter:  Why can't we just snick in?
Mike: Whaddaya mean, snick?  It's sneak.  I sneak, you sneak, they sneak...
Peter:  Oh, good.  Then we can all get in.

(Micky is singing the Circus Boy theme, if you didn't already know.)
(If you didn't know that, then perhaps you don't know that Micky starred in "Circus Boy" when he was 10)


Captain Crocodile

(The Monkees are getting bathing caps and tarps put on them, just before being pied.)
Mike:  Don't hurt my hat!  Don't hurt it!

Micky: Here I go, taking a seat.
Mike: Take two, they're small.

Micky: Let's play "To Tell a Fib"
Mike: My name is David Jones.
Davy: My name is David Jones.
Peter: My name is David Jones.
Micky: Will the real David Jones please stand up?
Davy: I am standing up.

Davy: And Reuben the Tadpole!
(I love that!  The greatest sidekick name I've ever heard!)

(Mid-fight scene)
Peter: Do you think we ought to ruin some furniture?
Mike: Oh, you mean chairs and stuff?  Okay.

Mike: And I said to myself, "Why am I watching this when I could be out cleaning garbage cans?

Submitted:
Mike: Either you let us play or we quit!


Monkees A la Mode

Ms. Osbourne: Tell me, Mr. Jones, what do you look for in a girl?
Davy: Well, um, it all depends what I've lost.

Micky: Hey, baby, I'm kind of new in town, can you direct me to your apartment?

Mike: Hold on, Quaggy-poo, I got a few things to say...

You can kind of see the camera in the little mirror next to the kitchen sink after Toby brings the magazine before Micky recieves the telegram.

I  often find myself imitating that smile Mike gives Peter after he guesses that Madame Q signs her name in brown ink.

Davy bald!  I can't bear it!


Alias Micky Dolenz

Police Chief: Gangsters are just like ordinary people... with Tommy guns.

What kind of police chief hands out diamonds (not to mention evidence) as rewards?

Yes, Micky's fly is halfway down during the opening scene.  I don't think I would have noticed if I hadn't read it somewhere else.

"The Kind of Girl I Could Love" romp is one of my all time favorites.

Notice the "Peace" demonstrater in the police station?  Subtle jab at "the man"...

Submitted by Rainbow at The Library of Babyface Morales :
My favorite show! That wig his double wears...not good. And that cop that caught 'em was stupid! Lol! And which is the real Micky...the one on the right. (Pay close attention to the suits he and "Babyface" wear and you can tell.)

Ed. Note: Plus, "Babyface" is still kind of doing the tough voice, Micky's in his higher range.


Monkees Chow Mein


Mike: Oh, I can explain that.  You see, Peter picks up fortune cookies like that and takes 'em home and feeds 'em to a dog we don't have.

Mike: I don't think we're in any danger.
Micky: Oh, no?  You know that movie wax museum we passed on the way home?
Mike: Yeah?
Micky: Was Gary Cooper Chinese?
Mike: No.
Micky: Then we're being followed.

Inspector: In our business, secrecy is our most important weapon!  Utter secrecy!
Mike, Davy, and Peter: Secrecy, secrecy, secrecy, secrecy, secrecy.
Inspector: What are you doing?
Mike: Uttering "secrecy".

Mike and Davy look so cute as Monkeemen, especially with the glasses.
Especially Mike.

Mike: Ugly, ugly, ooh, are you ugly!  And nobody likes you, least of all me.

Dragonman, or... Captain Crocodile!

Submitted by Rainbow at The Library of Babyface Morales :
Inspector...or Cap. B.J. Hunnicutt a few too many miles from Korea?


Monkee Mother

Mike says he comes from a big family...  Let's see, there's Mike, and his mom, and.... Oh, wait, that's it.

Submitted by Rainbow at The Library of Babyface Morales :
Millie...or Bessie, the Big Man's wife?


Monkees on the Line

"Jeffery!"

Ellen Farnsby!  I love this episode because I get to hear Mike say my first name.

Oooh, and when Mike wakes up after falling asleep on the table and he isn't wearing his hat, and his hair is all long...  *swoon*
Oooh, and the condor impression!  I love the condor impression!


Monkees Get Out More Dirt

Seen in April's Laundromat:
"Clothes Lines are for the Birds."

When April is clinging to Mike on the Motorcycle (during the Romp), it looks like she's trying to bite his hair or something.


Monkees in Manhattan

Not the greatest episode, uses a lot of old footage, but I seem to remember a very good interview segment at the end.

Submitted by Erin :
Ever notice all the songs Davy sings are basically the same thing except with different music?

Submitted by Christy :
This episode has an extended mix of "Look Out (Here Comes Tomorrow) which is also heard on The Monkees "Music Box".


Monkees at the Movies

Philo: I want you to meet Luthor Kramm. Mr. Kramm gave you "Beach Party Honeymoon".
Peter: You didn't give it to us! We had to PAY for it!
Mike: Yeah! It cost us eighty cents at the drive-in!
Kramm: Well it was worth it, wasn't it?
Mike: Um... you owe me sixty cents

Kramm:  It's about sadness, and pain, and cruelty; all the things that make life worthwhile.

Micky:  Look at that rock, it's a phony rock...  Look at that fish, it's a phony fish...  Look at that girl.... Oh, yeah...

I'm crazy about you, baby, and you know you're nuts about me, too.  Now why don't you say those three little words- You know the ones I mean--
You're under arrest.

I don't think the guys play volleyball properly.  Well, they certainly don't use the gym class techniques I've always been taught.

My, my, doesn't Bobby Sherman (Frankie Catalina) wear rather tight swimming trunks?  Ugh.  You can really tell if you look over Philo (the yesman) 's shoulder when he talks about Frankie's versitility.

Poor Micky.  Kramm slams the screen door on his trailer right into Mick's face.

I think the way they draw straws is hilarious.

It's Been Lonesome in the Saddle Since My Horse Died.

Submitted:
Davy (singing "I Really Love You"): Baby, I love you... Baby, really I do...


Monkees on Tour

Those pictures of a half-naked Mike with wet hair that you see all the time come from this episode.
I just about passed out : )

Submitted by Rainbow at The Library of Babyface Morales :
Micky...ya shoulda worn shoes when horseback riding!
Submitted by Sue:
On horseback riding barefoot:
Micky:  These boots are wearing thin.
Davy:  Those boots ain't made for walking, baby!
---+---
Peter:  I'm pretty good for an amateur. I guess you could call me a
middler.
---+---
Did you notice that Davy talks about playing with a swan, but at the
end, it shows Peter down on one knee trying to coax the swan over.
GCF note: Hmmm... I seem to remember Davy hangin' with the swan and talkin' to it.  (Suddenly the theme song from Hangin' with Mr. Cooper comes to mind.)


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